Preparing For Lent

Go you also into my Vineyard.

Today was Septuagesima Sunday. The readings today scared the heck out of me when I really thought about them.

Father said that although Septuagesima (the third Sunday before the beginning of Lent) is not Lent, it is the beginning of our preparation for Lent. Today is the day when we acknowledge that we are exiles, and the reasons for that. (Hint: Adam and Eve were cast out of the Garden for their sin, and because of that we have that pesky original sin).

I was struck by the readings and tried to figure out how they related to one another. The Epistle was from 1 Corinthians, where Paul tells the Corinthians that one can run the race, thinking he is doing what is right, and still wind up being a castaway. He goes on to say that the Jews were under the cloud (remember, the Pillar of Cloud that was God that followed them around?), they passed through the sea, they ate the manna and drank water from the rock (spiritual bread and drink), and yet "...with most of them God was not pleased."

The Gospel was from Matthew 10. 1-16. It's the parable about the man who hired workers to work in his vineyard. He hired some at the beginning of the day, some a little later in the day, some still later, and some at the last hour of the day. They all received the same agreed upon wage, but the workers who worked all day long complained that the workers who were hired later were paid the same as them. They didn't think it fair that the latecomers were being made "equal to them." And not only that, but the latecomers were paid first!

The master tells them that he has done them no wrong, that they are being paid what was agreed upon. The reading ends with "For many are called, but few chosen."

We may say we are Christians, we may go to Mass, receive the Sacraments, pray, give money and time, strive to "win the race," but it is possible that God will not be pleased with us. We may be cast away, because after all, we are filled with that original sin that causes us to worry about what other people are doing, to judge them and think ourselves better, to sin in all kinds of ways. We should be looking at our own sins, at what God expects from us, at how we can do His will, rather than at what our neighbor is doing.

I've had the feeling for the past few months that I'm going through the motions, but not truly doing what God expects of me. I hope to spend the next three weeks before Lent in some deep soul-searching and prayer. I want to really know and love God, to do His will in every part of my life, to be close to Him. I believe in God's love and mercy, and know that His will is for me to be with Him in Heaven some day. Please don't let me mess up, Father!

Make Thy face to shine upon Thy servant, and save me in Thy mercy; let me not be confounded, O Lord, for I have called upon Thee. (Psalm 30. 17-18)