Monday, September 26, 2011

Sad (Updated)

I hate having nothing to write about except the cancer stuff, so blogging has been slow lately.

This week we will probably start the chemo treatments. Not looking forward to that. I don't yet know the results of the bone marrow biopsy that was done on Thursday, or the MRI that was done on Friday. Dr. B and Dr. T (neurosurgeon who placed the Ommaya reservoir) are coordinating the timing of the chemo so that Dr. T can be there the first time to show them exactly where and how to use the Ommaya. I still have the staples in my head, but they are to come out tomorrow.

All of this pales in comparison to what is really on my heart and mind today. Yesterday Reece was in here with me, and he said that he eats in the cafeteria. I said, "Do you like eating lunch in the cafeteria?" and he said that he did. I said, "Do you eat with all the other kids?" and he said, "No, I eat with myself." I said, "Oh, you don't eat with the other kids in your class?" and he said "No, they don't like me." It just broke my heart to hear him say that. I asked him why he thought they didn't like him and he said they are mean to him. Then he wouldn't talk about it any more.

This is exactly the kind of thing I was afraid would happen if he went to school. I just cannot bear knowing that anyone is being unkind to him. I hate this! I don't know what to do. I feel like someone punched me in the stomach.

Reece still seems to like going to school. He had to stay home one day last week with a fever, and he asked me if he would still go to school. I told him yes, that he was only staying home because he was sick, but he would go back again when he was well. He said that he would just stay home, but he didn't object at all the next day when he was getting ready for school. He sings little songs that he learns and tells me about playing with pattern blocks and going to the library. He still says that he likes school.

But he doesn't like to do the work required and won't try very hard. His teachers have said that he doesn't participate. He has always been slower than most kids to learn things, but he does learn them. The problem is that in school they are all expected to do the same things at the same time, and the cookie cutter approach is just not going to work for Reece.

His reactions to things are different from most kids, too. When he really likes something, he will shake his hands, do a little dance and get really excited. He likes to make loud noises, but I don't think he does that at school--at least we haven't heard from any of his teachers that he does that. Maybe those kinds of things make him seem strange to the other kids. It breaks my heart, though, because he loves other kids and he has such a sweet spirit. I don't want to see that broken, and I'm so afraid it will be (or has been).

His parents have written a note to his teacher asking for an evaluation, but there has been no response so far. Please send up a prayer for my sweet little buddy. Thanks.

*Update* Reece's teacher finally called his mommy this morning to schedule a meeting. His parents will meet with her and the counselor tomorrow morning. Thanks for your prayers! Please keep praying for him. Thank you friends and loved ones.


Sarah Oldham said...

Is this as public school? Public schools are notoriously slow to react on parents requests. You will likely have to actually speak to his teacher in person to get the ball rolling. Also, if you feel something is amiss, don't ignore it. Get the school guidance councilor's advice. I agree that the cookie-cutter approach is horrible . . . of course, boys are usually the ones to be left behind and have bad experiences earlier on which shape their negative opinion of school for years (as is the case with my oldest son, who will graduate this year from high school . . . and not pursue education after).

I am continuing, as ever, to keep you in prayer. . . . I don't think cancer is your life, but if it is what you post about, it is what you post about. It helps me to pray for you, but you have to post what you want. Love and hugs to you!

Kalona said...

Sarah, yes, it's a public school. I'm relieved that Reece's parents now have a meeting scheduled with his teacher and the counselor. Thank you once again for your faithful prayers.

Therese said...

I am,so sorry to read this Kalona. I think Amelia was much the same when she started school. She was extremely shy and didn't like to run and play with the other children.

To look at her now though, you wouldn't believe she is the same child. I think homeschooling was good for her and in spite of everything everyone says about socialization, it was homeschooling that brought her out of her shell and made her more social.

I will be praying for Reece.

Kalona said...

Thank you for your prayers, Therese.

Adrienne said...

I'm thinking he may be just too young for school. Not all kids develop at the pace.

@Therese - the kids my husband teaches that are homeschooled are always the most socialized and the brightest. We call the public school kids (except for a very few exceptions) the "droolers."

Linda said...

Kalona, don't lose heart. I always felt like the other children were "mean" when I was a child, and often they were. I did find out later though, that many a child feels that, because everything is so different. He is accustomed to having one-on-one with you; this is a shock to have to "blend in" with so many others.
As for your cancer, it does not define you. However, even if this becomes a "My Life with Cancer" blog, so be it. That is where you are right now, and we're right here with you. I think I speak with all your readers when I say, I love you.